What’s a fear you’ve overcome — and how did you do it?
This is my first ever blog… ¡ started it back in November of last year… one reason was to help make it easier for me when ¡ get ready to write my first ever book… about my life…
¡ know fear
It knows me
¡ve been at war with it since the 90s
And newsflash
¡m winning
¡ always knew ¡ would
¡ do not give up
And ¡ do not give in
There’s been many dim lit days… dark nights… where it appeared though it had me.
But fear’s power is one that is borrowed
Borrowed from me
So ¡ve learned not to fuel it
…
All ¡ know… is what it did take to make this
All ¡ am… is what it will take… to break this
…
On a lighter note
Let’s talk about something a little more relatable
Spiders.
Big effin’ huge ones.
So ¡ve always been scared of them in the past… like fearful…
And I’m an outdoorsman haha
¡m not scared of much
Like snakes for example
Even poisonous ones ¡ will catch and hold carefully…
They don’t bother me at all
But spiders had my number
Until the summer of 2o1O
That’s when ¡ finally dealt with it
¡ was living and working at a Christian men’s drug rehab in Florida
It was a long-term treatment program
The guys lived there for 18 months
¡ was the resident director and lived in the same house with them
Well… the pastor that ran it wanted me to have my own place separate from everyone
So he purchased a used fifth-wheel camper trailer and we set it up out back on the ten-acre property
Hold up…
Let me back up a lil
The property had a lot of spiders
Florida has a lot of spiders lol
We would find them in the men’s residence all the time
Come to find out… they are called Huntsman spiders
And they are enormous and intimidating… most as big as your hand.
Ok… back to the story…
The camper had some type of hole somewhere underneath the frame
And shortly after ¡ moved in
So did all my long-legged, hairy little roommates
They would crawl on me while ¡ was sleeping
¡d wake up and they would be on… the ceiling… the walls… the floor… just all over
¡ went to put my bedroom shoes on once…
And a big one was in there
¡ could feel it on my bare toes
It was frantically moving around trying to get out haha
So like lightning… ¡ pulled my foot out and out it came… then it ran up my leg
These types of things happened often with my new friends
…
¡ didn’t think ¡ could stay
Live here like this
In this place… with them. 😬
…
We searched and searched trying to find how they were getting in
But we never found it
As the days passed
¡ had more encounters
Daily…
Nightly…
Then it occurred to me
¡ had never once been bitten by one
So ¡ did much praying
Asking God to help me get over this fear
And He did
Little by little
¡ got to where it didn’t bother me
¡ even stopped trying to kill them
¡ got to where ¡ could lay in bed at night and read
Even if one was resting on the wall beside me
Sometimes there might be three or four in plain sight in the room at the same time
And it didn’t faze me anymore
…
¡ stayed in that camper for about a year
…
Never once got bit
Not one time
…
There was nothing to fear… ever.
…
…
only something to face.
…
…
This is a Huntsman Spider I was told… not a Wolf Spider as me and my friends are calling it in this video…
For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind. — 2 Timothy 1:7
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Heart of Loia `'.,°~ 